Feeeeelings

I feel untalented. I'm struggling with my uke and piano and singing and life.
I need to use these skills constantly. Yesterday I called my Daddy to thank him for the years and years of piano lessons even though I didn't practice. It's because he let me keep taking the lessons that I'm able to more easily do what I need to do day-to-day. I learned a lot in those years. My Daddy is awesome. Not only for my piano lessons and Macbook, but for always listening and loving me.

My kids are mean to me and each other. I knew that teaching would have a lot more to it than just teaching...but Dear Lord! Fighting, crying, rude rude rude, feeling hurt and killing the mood.
But today was nice...I marched in the Veterans' Day Parade with the 5th & 6th graders and they sang "Miss Echols's song." Touched my heart as they screamed..i mean sang it...around the plaza.

THERE IS TOO MUCH TO DO I'M OVERWHELMED AGGGGGGH.

I feel like a fatty

Patience

Sometimes I declare that I don't want to do this anymore...but that's not true. I just want to see that it all turns out alright. That by May, my chorus kids are going to miss me. That by May, I'll be re-venturing. That by May, I'll feel like I had a successful year of teaching with a job I'm going to enjoy next year...wherever in the world that may be. I'm homesick for my family and friends, but this is where I'm supposed to be. Or maybe Germany. but we'll see...

I'll admit I haven't been running. I'm so tired after school and there's planning and other stuff to do. I'm still aiming for a 5K on November 19th...though it's already snowing/freezing.

I bought a new beautiful black electric ukulele. It's my new baby. I feel like a rockstar.

That's the story. There's a lot more news. But it probably wouldn't be smart to share on the internet.

Ugh

Sick in bed today. First sick day as a professional.

Aunt Lesley and PopPop were here this past weekend. It was so good to see that I haven't been dropped into Wonderland and that people I knew still do exist. We ate a lot, went to a beautiful Flamenco show/dinner, shopping around, and they came to watch the band rehearse a little bit. PopPop had a crush on Andie and she was so cute and flattered. They were impressed with Michael and he really enjoyed them too. The hugs were just..awesome.
I felt bad that on Sunday I felt so sick and was just staring into space. I've gotten worse since and with the urging of my 2nd-grade-teacher-friend, I stayed home today.

What I want to do is lay here and listen to the same 2 Adele songs over and over and never leave bed. What I should do is get my laundry done, clean up, go to the DMV and switch everything over to New Mexico, get a Jiffy Lube, do all my lesson plans, practice uke, go to mentor circle, and save the world. I don't know what will happen.

Staying home is a crazy bad wonderful idea.

Snowboarding in Colorado.

Mmhmm I did it thanks to Michael. He coached me the whole way. I fell a lot...spent a lot of time laying in the snow wondering how the hell I was ever going to stand up again. Michael was patient and understanding that a body new to snowboarding is quite confused. We practiced a little on the bunny thing, then he helped me down the beginner hill 4 or 5 times before he went off and did his bigboy snowboarding. It was a triumph to just figure out how to stand up. I think I did okay, considering it was me.

We stayed in Pagosa Springs and then spent some time with his boss and his boss's wife in Durango. Colorado & New Mexico are beautiful. If all we did was drive in Michael's hella sexy Jeep, I'd totally be fine with that. It was a very good long weekend of breath-taking views and breath-stealing falls. I'm sore. but it was so much fun!!

And grrr...I was in a new state and I forgot to hula hoop. Boo.


And then it's back to the grind. I feel like no education went on today. Maybe some fun, but I'm itching for more learning to take place. I just need to understand that school is more than my personal musical goals for my students and myself...it's assemblies, it's bloody noses, it's drama, it's "he touched me," it's "she said the F word," it's lockdown drills, it's life.

Oh and if you didn't know, I'm singing with a band now. We do Ska/Hiphip/Pop stuff. 2 trumpets, a guitar, a bass guitar, drums, another girl singer, and me. It's gonna be really fun and may cure my itch to perform...though each day is a special performance of its own. Sigh...

Booyah.

The 5th grade boys have a crush on Miss Sunshine.

Meet Andie Bentley

I know you've heard a lot about her already, but I decided to make a blog post dedicated entirely to the lady who inspires me enough to do so.

At first-year-at-SFPS-teacher day, she was standing there alone and commented to me I think when I said that I just moved here too. Before I left she grabbed my number and I am so thankful that she did. She then texted to me, "Do you like hiking?" and I knew I had a friend.

We hike at our moderate pace, we get lost trying to find places...a lot, we laugh when there's nothing to laugh at, we're pretty much two insane blondes trying to find our way in the desert.

Andie is 28, from Indiana, and moved here for at least a year to say she did it. (kinda like me.) She teaches Kindergarten and definitely has the personality for it. I suppose that's why we get along. On our long drive to Bandelier, we shared stories and secrets, and we found out we're a lot more alike than we thought. We realized we had a support system within the two of us here in Santa Fe.

I'm so glad I have her, for this year and the years to come, because I know that no matter what happens with school, boys, housing, money, or anything else...I have someone smart and supportive to make me laugh, take on another adventure, go to yoga, or sometimes...just drive. Even if one or both of us return to our home states, she's my girl and I'll have a reason to go to Indy. The daily texts are uncanny, the blonde conversations I think only we could understand.

Another very important, special video...